| Tellyourtestimony URL: |
| http://www.tellyourtestimony.com/thecoffehousechr |
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| Jerry's Journals |
| Journal Entries |
Date Posted |
| My Testimony |
4/10/2008 |
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| Marketplace Ministry |
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| Status Update |
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Scott is tired! 6 hours ago...
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DALE is Blessed with 5 homes to air duct from 1 phone call thank you Jesus ! 18 hours ago...
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Scott is playing with his new Zune! :) 28 hours ago...
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Scott is sore from snowshoeing! 67 hours ago...
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Scott hopes everyone has a wonderful and Blessed New Year! 125 hours ago...
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| Jerry's Testimony |
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Well the truest feelings I have ever known in Christ were felt on March 31st, 2008. I tell you this part of my testimony now because it is the greatest part of my testimony.
I was Baptised on this day! Of course I was baptised as a child, but I obviously don't recall it. This one will be with me for the rest of my days. It is the day I looked to the west and spit in the face of the devil!!!
So now my testimony.
For a lot of my years, I have known God was there or something was there, I just never knew or cared what was. I spent a lot of my younger years lost, confused, angry, and looking for revenge for why my life was so bad and everyone elses was so good.
As I got older, I started looking for ways to make that pain go away. I retreated in music when I was thirteen years old. But that became more of an obsession than a filler. So as with Rock and Roll, there comes a life style that is "aquired". Of course it is obtained completely by choice. It was a choice that I made because, Hey, if it worked for Motley Crue, then it will work for me. They're always happy and smiling and have all the chics. Man, I was so wrong. So very wrong.
As I fast forward a bit, the rock and roll stopped for me. I was trying to lead a normal life. One day it dawned on me,"I am so bored not being who I was." I was bored with this life because I wasn't "being" something else. I wasn't being "someone else". All my years in bands had me so lost because with all the chemicals I polluted my mind and heart with, I had lost my own "unwanted" and unhappy identity.
So without the music, my dependency on artificial happiness became stronger. It was way out of control due to a broken heart from a failed relationship. You see I was already mixed up as it was, throw in the rejection of woman that I loved and you have one volatile time bomb waiting to erupt.
So as I spun further out of control with cocaine and tequila, I felt and impending doom looming over me, like something was chasing me and I was too scared to turn around and see.
Well, one fateful night I found out what it was.
I was going to try and get some sleep. I shouldn't say try, I had to get some sleep, I had to go to work in 2 hours. I was already going way too fast because of the drugs. I tried to take the edge of the drugs with tequila. So now I am speeding and slowing down at the same time. I still couldn't sleep. I was desperate to sleep. I grabbed a bottle of NyQuil that remained from when I was sick prior to this early morning. I drank most of what is the bottle.
"There," I thought, "That'll do it." Oh yeah,That'll do it.
I started feeling my heart pounding so hard and fast that I could swear I could hear it as if it were right there in my lap beating. The room started spinning on me really fast. I started getting chest pains beyond any human understanding (except for maybe someone who has experienced a heart attack or a stroke). I knew this was it; I AM GOING TO DIE TONIGHT. RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW, I am D-E-A-D.
At first I was scared and crying. I didn't know what to do. I just started to talk to God. I said to him, "I don't want to die. I am not ready to die!!!" After that, I got angry and actually called him on. I yelled, "BRING IT ON IF THATS WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO DO!!! IT DOESN'T MATTER, MY LIFE IS A MESS ANYWAY!!!"
After a while, I must have fallen asleep. I didn't make it to work that day. But I did get rest. For some odd reason, I slept.
I moved out of the home I shared with my cousin who also shared in my love for drugs and alcohol. I cleaned up on my own after that. No rehab, No counseling, Just God and me.
You think thats it? You think thats my testimony?
No friends, that was only the beginning of my testimony. Here is the rest of it:
Once I was clean, I knew God existed and was thanful to have made it through, but like most who call on him only when they need him, I was no different. "Thanks God for pulling me out of that mess. I'll take it from here. I call if I need you again."
I was a fool.
For the sake of this already being long, I will jump ahead for all of you.
I found the love of my life. She wa the most beautiful and perfect thing I had ever seen. She and I were in love instantly.
We spent a lot of time talking and getting to know more and more about each other. I found out that she had a christian upbringing, but was practicing as much as he once did. Nor I.
We were so much in love. we really were.
Something strange started happening, we were finding out more and more about God together. I had someone to learn with, how awesome.
After being together for two years, we decided we wanted to live together. We couldn't stand being away from each other. Although we knew it wrong before God, we had every intention of marrying after that year. Well it ended up going on the third year and her and I were still not married. I was unhappy for all new reasons. I couldn't get ahead in the job world. My money wasn't that great. I wanted to give her everything. I love her more than anything, ANYTHING. Yes, even more than God.
That love for her help make me bitter I later found out. It wasn't her fault, it was mine for wanting to give what I didn't have and for loving her more than all else.
I was seld destructing. I was so jealous of my friends for having such good jobs and good oppurtunitys. I really started to hate them and everything that stood against me or I thought stood against me. It was Satan standing against me and loving every minute of me running in circles and fighting what I couldn't see.
She could take no more. Two weeks before our four year relationship ended, we started going to church together. I was watching TV when I came across the great Joel Osteen. His message that night I could've swore it was directed right at me.
He said, " Satan has you friend. He is enjoying watching you make a mess out of your own life. Today is the day you must let Jesus in your heart to combat his wicked ways." I knew it. I heard it. I knew right where that came from.
I dropped to my knees and I prayed and cried and cried and prayed and cried and cried and cried. I cried for most of that hour or so.
The next week, my relationship ended. I never felt hurt like that and never want to feel it again. But as it ended, I was already saved. Jesus and The Father were going to show me the way. I was stripped of all that I love more than God and Jesus Christ. I was slowly rebuilt and have never stopped over a year later.
I live by the path of Jesus Christ.
As far as God goes, I live by these simple words:
"Father let me always live by your will, your word, and your way. AMEN"
That is my testimony. I apologize for the length. Its just that God working in my life is so exciting to me and I want everyone to know.
God Bless All of you. Thank You For Reading This.
Jerry
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Jerry's Testimony Info
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Which categories of people did you belonged to before you were saved?
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The Abandonded, The Musician, Other
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| Who have been your best examples? |
My ex-fiance, My friend Tom Malota, and Pastor Terry Timm of CCCSH
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| List books, music or ministries that have helped your walk: |
Books: The Bible, RT Kendalls-Living in Total Forgiveness, Joyce Meyer-Reduce Me to Love, Joel Osteen-Becoming a Better You.
Music: Casting Crowns, Brandon Heath, Jeremy Camp, Toby Mac, Demon Hunter, and many,many more of our beloved Christian Artists
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| List ministries you are involved with: |
This one. Myspace minstries.
Pillars ministry.
Thats about it.
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| List ministry websites: |
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Church:
Church website:
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| Prayer requests: |
Please pray that I can adapt to my new life that God has lead me to. Please pray that his will is for me to succeed here in the west.
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| Occupation/Business/School: |
Massage Therapy and Rehabilitation
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| Business Website: |
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